This post has been over a week delayed. Cameran's party was the 20th. Her birthday, coincidentally World Down syndrome Awareness Day, the 21st, the 22nd her 12 month check up=shots which make me nervous, the 23rd her Interventionist appointment, and the rest of the week a blur. No, there are no party pictures yet. Yes I have them thanks to Emily, who graciously took them, but no to actually uploading them.
This post is supposed to be uplifting and happy and in rememberance of Cami's first year. But I am a dweller. And ever since it has been suggested that Cameran's "head butts" aka "hiccups" might actually be seizures by her PT I have been a mess. At least when she went to her check up and didn't even have one Dr. W still said it was curious and set up a consult with a neurologist for this coming Tuesday. And I know that "What will be will be" and that "God doesn't give you more than you can handle" and "Stop worrying, she'll be fine"---but seriously? Unless you have spent the last year in this mama's shoes, then
It's hard enough having accepted that Cameran will be working twice as hard to do things that are natural to most of us, but she does NOT deserve to have more crap piled on top. Delays I can handle. Delays I have accepted. Does it suck having to spoonfeed your kid her "Smash Cake" when she should be digging in and putting her hands to her own mouth? Yep. Does it sometimes cause heart pangs of jealousy when I see the other kids in her room at daycare crawling and even walking at less than 12 months. Yep. But I am good with that. I accept that. I do not accept her PT telling me she needs checked out because she is a pseudo-neurologist. Not when this mama already has enough to deal with.
Then there are my students. Now don't get me wrong; I
There. I ranted. Writing is supposed to be therapy, correct? I came. I wrote. I conquered. Next time I will come back with happy tales of Hawaii, luaus, and leis. (Pictures too!) And if all goes well, good news from the neurologist!